Money is often a significant roadblock to starting a major life transition.
One of the most common questions I’m asked by people considering a major career change is about finances. “If I stop working, where's my regular income going to come from? Isn't it better to build up my savings first? What if I don’t have enough money yet to support myself?”
The pursuit of ‘enough’ can become a never-ending quest. We can end up staying in an unfulfilling job for years or even decades despite craving a change, in order to have ‘enough’ savings to one day move forwards.
As inertia builds, the ‘golden handcuffs’ (or for some of us, a cheaper iron version) become tighter or we simply lose the resolve to unlock and remove them. We become trapped with the intention of a future transition that doesn’t materialise.
There is a high cost to this.
Remaining in a suboptimal situation has an adverse effect on mental and physical health, relationships, workplace performance and overall well-being. It can lead to stress, burnout, anger and depression. Every day spent accumulating ‘enough’ money is another 24 hours of denying ourselves the opportunity to be more fulfilled.
So how do we avoid or escape the Money Trap during major life transitions?
The Money Trap is a tangled web of fears and rationalisations - too complex for one blog - so I’ll break it down over a few. First up:
Money Trap #1: The Both-And Approach
The Both-And Approach, or what I call part-time purgatory, is a clever-sounding trap where you try to straddle both your old career and your new aspirations simultaneously. Instead of making a clean break with the past, you attempt to maintain a part-time version of your former life while reserving your free time for exploring new avenues.
I'll admit, it's a trap I fell headfirst into.
Several years ago, I knew I wanted to leave the non-profit sector, but I also knew I needed time and space to figure out my next steps. Making the choice between the two was tough because I was also convinced I needed to earn an income during this transitional period. My solution to this dilemma was to work part-time as a consultant and also coach in the non-profit sector. In theory, it made sense – I could fund my exploration while still paying the bills.
However, the reality was far from straightforward. My new part-time commitments, including marketing and growing my consulting and coaching businesses, consumed a huge chunk of my time and energy. As a result, my capacity for venturing into the unknown was severely limited.
Keeping One Foot In the Past Prevents You From Stepping Forwards
The both-and approach isn't necessarily as rational or clever as it seems. The emotional and physical toll of maintaining a status quo that is not fulfilling is often underestimated. When you're drained and depleted, it's nearly impossible to muster the mindset of ideation, creativity, and self-inquiry needed for a successful career transition. You are too tired to think about your next steps, and your thinking is scattered.
Holding onto your past commitments keeps one foot in your old life, preventing you from fully stepping into your future. Your identity remains tethered to who you once were, rather than embracing the exciting potential of who you could become. Moreover, each 'yes' to a commitment from your past limits the time, energy, or resources available for exploring new opportunities.
In essence, it's like trying to have it both ways, living a scaled-down version of the status quo while yearning for change. It's a part-time purgatory, a state of perpetual in-between.
Building Your Awareness
With major life transitions, there's no one-size-fits-all answer. It's your own unique path. Maybe the both-and approach will work for you. But for most of us, it will slow down or even stall our metamorphoses.
What’s most important is to build awareness of the potential pitfalls and opportunities on the transition journey, so that you can mindfully take action towards greater fulfillment.
Stay tuned for more insights into the Money Trap, as we explore issues like scarcity, judgment, and martyrdom in the next blog!